Marty Prehn's Fall TV Lineup

Maybe you don’t have cable. Maybe you do, but you only watch network-TV shows. Or maybe you’re just searching for a handy resource to set your DVR. Whatever the case may be, enjoy our compendium of every Marty Prehn show airing on television this fall.

Print out this handy guide and keep it close to your TV. Don't miss out on any opportunity to see our favorite idiot in action!

Monday nights are one of the most important in Marty's "must see" TV line up. The first and third Monday of each month are the Saint Clair Shores City Council meetings. By now it should be obvious that every TV in the metro Detroit area is tuned in for the bi-weekly State of the Mongoose address. This is when everyone gets both a recap of the last two weeks of Marty greatness but also a preview of what lies - I mean events - Elder Dawg has coming. On the Mondays when there is no council meeting, catch Marty on Fox2Detroit as a regular on "Let it Rip" as he joins his close personal friend Huel Perkins to discuss his greatness.

Tuesday nights will feature Marty's new variety show. Robin Williams was the original co-host but now that he's assumed room temperature, Marty's unemployed good friend Jay Leno has agreed to join the show. Rumor has it that his friends Bob Seger, Amy Lee and Kenny Chesney will be leading the house band. Bette Midler and Debby Boone might just stop by, so don't miss it! In fact, this show will feature different friends of Marty's from all walks of the entertainment industry, as well as various politicians and heads of state. The list of possible guest is too long to list here but, based on Marty's Hollywood connections, this show will put Kimmel, Letterman and Fallon to shame. One of the recurring skits will be Stupid Marty Tricks. You won't want to miss this, folks. "Watch me lie out of both sides of my enormous ass!" Don't miss his "Dwarf Bowling with Jamie Victory" sketch, either.

On Wednesday Marty will be pulling a double shift. MTM (Marty the Mongoose) productions couldn't let a week go by without having Marty on a daytime talk show. Marty will be teaming up with his gal-pal Ellen for this daytime magic. This show will cover current events in Marty's life with a focus on his good works. Each week Marty will present his case for why Ellen should buy him a house, car, clothes and such. The ceiling of the studio will be lined with tin foil to protect Marty from lightning strikes. You know, because God will not be mocked and all...

Marty will also have a prime time Wednesday night production because America needs the Mongoose five nights a week. This show will be another fundraiser for Marty's biggest charity: himself. Each week Marty will highlight his latest money making scam. This week will feature his Lakeview Reunion Dinner. The location for this event has been changed once again but Marty figured out he shouldn't reveal it. If he doesn't say where it is, people can't call and find out it's all another lie.

Thursday nights will be dedicated to Marty's various federal crime fighting operations. This show will be called "The Stalkout Stakeout". John Walsh will join Marty as they expose the worst code violators in Saint Clair Shores. Covert stakeouts, "quad copter" flyovers conducted by real estate agents, and voice recognition of Facebook posts will be just a few of the techniques used by the "Code Violation Avenger". This America's Most Wanted type show will feature a different criminal each week. His former landlord will be featured on the first show, followed by an old lady with sixteen cats who refused his sexual advances. Programing Note: May not be suitable for younger viewers or those offended by watching XXX " masturbate to multiple orgasms".

Next comes the biggest night for MTM productions. Marty will completely take over prime time with a three hour extravaganza! Friday night will be:

"Marty's Elder Abuse/Human Trafficking/Cyber Stalking/Deed Restriction/Veterans/POW/Domestic Violence/Suicide Prevention/Good Works Telethon!"

This show will have a different co-host each week. So far, Grizzly Adams, Betty White, Doris Roberts, Paula Dean, and Sarah Palin have already been signed up. When you include every television news anchor that's appeared on Detroit TV the last ten years, the list of co-hosts is unbelievable. This show will highlight all of the above mentioned atrocities and show viewers how they can help Marty end them: DONATIONS! The catering and lotion cost have skyrocketed at the MTM production studio at apartment #6 at the Saint Clair Apartments, so everyone needs to contribute. All of Marty's good works aren't possible without people like you.

So make some popcorn. Gather up the kids, friends and any elderly veterans you may know and get your PayPal accounts ready for the new MartyTV lineup. If successful, plans are "in the works" for a 24/7 cable channel - All Marty/All the Time!