Marty Prehn's Historic Wet Dream!

Giddyup, CoMmies!

We're back with the next installment of our coverage of the biggest fame hound, lying idiot humanity has ever spawned, Marty Prehn. 

As the Mongoose continues to announce more of his incredible fantasy events, he has actually reached the level of "historic" that he loves to tag everything that he does. The amount of lying and overall stupidity in these announcements is the only thing that is historic, in my opinion. I'm starting to wonder if Marty is still high from the drugs he was taking after his "near death, emergency yet scheduled heart procedure" or if his mental delusions have reached "historic" levels. Either way, it's fun to watch the moron dream bigger and bigger every day.

Here is the next great Marty fantasy event, where he dreams of having friends and endless food:

Marty starts out this latest delusion by asking Terry Bomar to be sure and invite his famous friends to join Marty in Michigan for his imaginary Dan Haggerty Tribute and Awards Dinner. We've given this event some coverage before and it appears Marty is still going with that lie. He still fails to give the location for this star studded gala but I'm sure he'll announce that soon enough. I'm also still wondering if Marty is going to announce a ticket price for this dinner, what's on the menu and other details that all events like this announce in advance. What does Marty expect Terry to tell his friends when he invites them? "Hey guys, plan to come to Michigan for a Dan dinner that I know nothing about other than some idiot on Facebook says is happening June 17th." Certainly sounds like a great plan so far.

Marty also makes sure to ask Terry to include the Eastpointe Cruise the next day. Elder Dawg has the great plan of setting up booths for theses stars at the cruise so they can sign autographs and conduct "meet and greets". Who is responsible for these "booths" Marty wants to set up? Is Marty arraigning that along with all of his dinner plans? How does Marty plan on paying for all of these necessities? Is there once again unnamed corporate sponsors to be announced soon? So many unanswered questions that need to be addressed before these "Hollywood celebrities" have their people book hotel rooms and flights.  "Stop my filming, hold that studio recording session. I'm going to Detroit to hang out with Marty Prehn!"

Marty left this comment on a post made by Terry about a friendly get-together they affectionately called "High Chaparral Reunion" so naturally, Marty also adds a Michigan High "Chapparel" (idiot can't even copy the proper spelling) Reunion in an attempt to catch the interest of this group of actors. This reunion is a western style picnic that suddenly gets added to Marty's Dan Haggerty Invitational Cruise Weekend. It's to be held at "high noon" the same day as the memorial dinner. Marty attempts to let Terry know the location for this picnic without actually giving away the name of the location to his hated cyber stalkers. But, as with everything covert the Mongoose attempts to do, he fails miserably. Anyone who has access to the Internet can easily find the location of Dan's artwork. It's located at The Old Lambert Dairy Farm in Washington Township, Michigan. One quick phone call gets the same results that looking into any of Marty's lies does. When the lady who answered the phone is asked for details about Marty Prehn's upcoming picnic, she gives the standard answer, "MARTY WHO?" The property owners have no clue that they are hosting a picnic that includes Hollywood legends and Nashville country stars. I'm sure everyone who reads here is as shocked as I am.

There is one other claim the Mongoose makes in this pipedream that I have to mention. Marty says he's working to get a Michigan Historical Landmark dedicated to pointing out the history that was made the day he waited in line for an autograph and picture with Dan Haggerty and Pete Lucido. My first reaction was "what history?" but, then I started thinking. What if I'm wrong? What if Marty really is an important and influential person in Michigan? Just to be sure, I sent Bob Cookout undercover to see what he could find out about Marty's historical importance to this location and the entire state of Michigan. While posing as a janitor inside Pete Lucido's office, RC3 uncovered some unbelievable new information. Not only does the State of Michigan feel Marty did make history that day, they are actually erecting a marker to commemorate that historic site. Cookout even managed to get a picture of the marker as it was being installed. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the first public glimpse of the marker notating Marty's place in Michigan history:

At first, I was stunned and confused by the marker and the story it told. I couldn't understand why I'd never heard about Marty pissing himself and why this was so historic. I then did a little digging and found out the whole story. If you look at the picture Marty is so proud of, the same picture he searched for weeks to find so he could post it, you'll see the truth:

That's right CoMmies, look at Marty's pants in the picture. They are indeed soaking wet in the crotch area only. But how can this be considered a historic event, I'm sure you're all asking. It's now makes perfect sense. At no time in the history of the State of Michigan has an elected official been more embarrassed than Pete Lucido is at the exact moment this picture was taken. HISTORY INDEED! Thank God it doesn't show the errection Marty is surely sporting.

So I'll close this report by congratulating Marty "The Mongoose" Prehn:

CONGRATULATIONS, MARTY! YOU ARE FINALLY PART OF MICHIGAN HISTORY!