Mongoose Abuse: The Silent Struggle

Something you don't read Marty claiming to be a victim of - yet - is the uglier than sin topic of Domestic Violence, a crime ripe for Marty to exploit. It's amazing what information a few drinks at G. Willie's can yield. 

Police and media typically redact the names of domestic violence victims, and we're no exception. For that reason, we're reporting on an incident that occurred three days before Christmas and will only refer to those involved as Smaller Man and Big Fat Slob.

Last month, Big Fat Sob called the police in fear for his safety from Smaller Man after an argument.  It is alleged that Smaller Man got fed up with Big Fat Slob's slobbish housekeeping.  

Smaller Man was arrested and charged with domestic violence. He was forced to pay a $500 bond and was released from jail the next day.  Smaller Man is also now barred from returning to the marital home on Hayes Avenue until after the spat is resolved in court on 2/12/14.

Smaller Man has now been charged with domestic violence, had to hire a lawyer and pay $500 to bond out of jail. He also had to find a new place to live until Big Fat Slob gets his day in court next month.  I guess that's the price a 5'7", 160 lb man pays for yelling at his 6'4", 350 lb body guarding, bounty hunting, process serving, military trained roommate. Luckily, there were no injuries or even physical contact reported. He's also lucky that Big Fat Slob's lightning-fast reflexes and instincts didn't kick in or he would have found himself on the business end of a rolling pin or frying pan!

This is one domestic violence story that may have a happy ending. When Big Fat Slob finally gets evicted for any number of reasons, he'll be able to seek rent-free living in a battered women's shelter, where he'll find entirely new opportunities to play the victim and seek donations!