Linda Gets Desperate and Marty Gets Neutered

That look when caught giving a blowjob to a hobo. Priceless.

You guessed it CoMmies, it's that time once again. Here is the latest update on the Moronic Mongoose, Marty Prehn.

Now that Marty can't mooch off of his incarcerated felon son, it appears he has convinced Linda Fergan Bowery to take him back and support him yet again. This is just another example of what a great, powerful, connected, mover and shaker Marty really is. Homeless idiot convinces a lonely woman to take care of him. Sounds like Marty's entire life story.

Anyway, now that Linda is holding Marty's purse strings, it seems she also made him hand over his Facebook testicles. Marty has started using his backup Facebook page instead of his previous incredible life page with 4,118 friends. Instead, he's now posting to just a handful of obscure crackers. That's a pretty small audience for someone as influential as the often black Elder Avenger who has been at it for more than 60 years, don't you think?

Just like most of you I'm sure, I began to worry. We all know a neutered Elder Dawg isn't very fun. Well, don't despair faithful readers, Marty will never be able to contain his inner dumb ass. He posted this recent tidbit:

Of course, we've seen basically this same rant many times before. Elected friends, blah blah blah, proof of stalking, blah blah blah, five year felony, blah blah blah. I'm sure all of these alleged warnings Flem Ling was given by the judge are easy to read in the transcript of the great PPO hearing. You know, that transcript Marty has been threatening to publish for over a year. "It's coming, boy!" Sha, right.

I'll wrap this update up with a very brief summary; Marty has conned Linda into supporting him once again. I believe she now has his filthy testicles in the same purse that holds the money that sustains his lavish, jet-set lifestyle. We are still laughing at his idiotic threats that he'll never be able to deliver on.

Marty Wow! 

The Inevitable Marty Prehn

It's another great Friday here at CoM. As we wait for the next great "fireworks" display to hit Saint Clair Shores, the anticipation continues to build. The worlds biggest idiot, Marty Prehn, has gone much too long without any form of outburst. When will the Mongoose make his next threat filled attack post? How long until Elder Dawg announces his next great advocacy cause? Who will Marty target next with his attention stealing scams? At this rate, dumb ass Marty is never going to make the nightly news or front page.

Several rumors are swirling around Michigan that involve the continued downfall of the fake advocate/secret undercover agent Marty. Apparently, the people involved in these rumors don't use the Mongoose approach to life. Instead of broadcasting empty threats and lies about what they are going to do, they have decided to remain quiet about what real actions they are taking. Our crack operatives have been unable to confirm what is coming but, I have high hopes its going to be good. Maybe we'll finally get to see more "fireworks" like we witnessed at the SCS city council meeting that shamed Marty into submission.

We'll continue to keep our eyes and ears open in the pursuit of the next Marty embarrassment. If past history is any indication, there will be a great Marty attack coming soon. It may not come from Marty directly because, as the true coward he is, he uses others to do his dirty work now. Maybe there will be an upcoming press conference announcement. Or we might get more state police/FBI/CIA/DOJ threats that only the Mongoose and Carla are dumb enough to post. One thing is guaranteed, when Marty learns that more bad news is coming, he will be sure to fill the Internet with his lies, empty threats, and childish attacks. That's all Marty really knows how to do and I can't imagine this will ever change.

As Marty tries to keep his complete obsession with getting any form of attention from the press tamped down, the frustration in him must be growing. Marty's entire life is based on his constant attempt to garner any kind of notoriety. If the idiot hasn't figured out he's never going to achieve this life long goal by now, he's never going to. Has Marty finally figured out that everyone in his area of operation now is well aware of who he really is? Will Marty attempt to find new areas to seek the attention he so desperately craves? How much longer can he convince Flo that she is financing a great advocate without any form of proof he's doing anything other that sitting on the couch ordering pizza and wings with her money? How much longer will Linda put up with his smell and attempts to replace her? What will Marty be camping out to stamp out when he's once again sleeping in the Mongoosemobile?

Stay tuned right here because you know as soon as the biggest idiot we've ever seen pulls his next moronic stunt, we'll have the in depth coverage you've come to expect. All Marty, all the time, CoMmies!!

Stay Tuned!

Stay tuned for the latest Marty stupidity. 

Defendant Marty Prehn

It's Friday once again my fellow CoMmies, time for another Marty the Moron update. Now that the Mongoose has virtually disappeared from public view, we are counting the days until he reappears with some new advocacy cause that might get him on TV, or maybe more empty, worthless threats aimed at his "cyber stalkers". He's got to announce something to keep the cashFlo coming.

While doing a regular glance for new Marty stupidity, our operatives came across a little interesting tidbit. Marty is now a named defendant in a lawsuit filed by Eric Gala. This really isn't anything new for Marty. He's been sued several times with the same results. A default judgement against him because he never bothered to answer the suit or appear in court. In Marty's world, there really isn't a reason for him to show up. Other than what has to be a decrepit cottage, Marty has nothing. Trying to collect from Marty is an act of futility. You'll never see a nickel because he eats it as fast as he makes it. 

It appears that Marty's days of not caring if he gets sued are about to get complicated. There is now proof that Marty is using various Fergan's Carquest assets while stalking and harassing his victims. Video of him doing his stalking drive bys in the company delivery vehicle and IP tracking of his use of the company computer have changed the game. Marty using these company assets even after ownership was made aware he is doing it, makes Fergan's jointly responsible. The company can now be named as a defendant in the harassment and defamation suit that a little bird told me was getting filed soon. Maybe Marty shouldn't have defamed so many lawyers and powerful Detroit area people.

No one will ever get any money out of Marty. You can't get blood from a turnip, or money from a worthless, idiotic rodent. Unfortunately for Marty and Fergan's, people have decided to use the Bill Windsor playbook and name Fergan's as a party. I can't wait to see what Linda will say during her deposition. How will she and her dad explain the evidence they knew what Marty was doing and continued to allow the use of their company to help him do it?

What this will all come down to is, how much is Marty worth to Fergan's business? As Windsor's victims have learned, fighting a lawsuit gets really expensive really fast. How much is daddy Fergan willing to spend on lawyers just to clear his company's name because of Marty? If it was me, I'd get Marty out of my business faster than the Elder Dawg can eat a large pizza. As long as Marty is still employed there and given company assets to continue being Marty, more suits are sure to follow. Is an obese idiot delivery drive really valuable enough to justify tens of thousands in legal fees? I guess we'll soon find out.

Are you "Hot and Ready" Marty? Pizza Pizza you dumb ass!

 

Where Oh Where is Whittle Marty

Now that it's been over a week since the lynching of the Mongoose at the SCS city council meeting, Marty has remained in hiding. There have been no attack posts on his Facebook page. He hasn't announced a new advocacy cause or fundraiser scam. Marty hasn't even updated his fans about how well the benefit for Erica that he and The Hip Replacements put on this past weekend went. Maybe Elder Dawg collected so much money that he's still busy trying to count it. After a week of nothing from Marty, I have to borrow a song he wrote once. "Where oh where has whittle Marty gone? Oh where oh where could he be?"

During Marty's rebuttal of all the "allegations" presented to the council about him, he promised several things. Marty said he wasn't going to go into details about Erica's claims of him trying to hijack Wyatt's law and him posing as her agent. He instead was going to take it up with the newspapers. After checking with all the Detroit area newspapers, I've been unable to find any indication that there is an article pending about Marty in any way. Not even Marty's "good friend" Jamie Cook is working on a story to defend the good name of the Mongoose. Did Marty decide to have mercy on Erica and call off the hit piece about her that was destined for the front page of USA Today? That's the only explanation I can come up with for why the nation's press didn't rise up to correct the wrongs perpetrated against their beloved Elder Avenger.

During Marty's name dropping rebuttal to the council, he mentioned his recent favorite threat. Marty claimed he was having the Michigan AG's office involve the Michigan State Police in the investigation of the outrageous false claims against him. I'm sure by now there are teams of investigators working to arrest the criminal cyber stalkers who would dare point out Marty's own words and actions and use them to discredit his superhero reputation. It's a good thing the state of Michigan has an AG dedicated to protecting the good Mongoose name on a daily basis. I can't imagine the depth our great country would sink to if the luster of the Martin E Prehn name were to be dimmed. If world leaders will go to the trouble of changing decades of Cold World policies after Ronald Reagan spent one day with "Dimples Prehn", prosecuting Marty's detractors is the least the AG can do.

I've now begun scanning all the Detroit area television station news sites searching for Marty's next advocacy cause. We all know by now that Marty's advocacy is determined by what story might draw some media coverage. Maybe we haven't heard from the Mongoose because he doesn't want to tip anyone off to where he's going to be fundraising next. Or has Marty been called out of FBI retirement for a top secret undercover assignment? You know, once a Special Agent, always a Special Agent. Marty's unwavering dedication to protecting our country from evil takes priority over everything, except maybe sitting in the 7-11 parking lot staring at Primo's. Even a top secret undercover agent has to have his priorities.

Now that the SCS city council has told Marty to "stay the hell away", what the next move for the Mongoose? Will he find a new forum for pronouncing his great good works and attacking his cyber stalkers? Or will he use his standard approach and just pretend it didn't happen? How long will Marty stay tamped down before he comes back with a new advocacy scam and victims? Is Linda Fergan Bowery trying to rebuild the Elder Dawg's spirit so he can once again attempt to get donations rolling in order to help pay their enormous food bill? Will FERGAN'S Carquest continue to support Marty and all of his stalking endeavors? Stay tuned for the latest breaking news about Marty, you know it won't be long until his stupidity resumes.

Mongoose Goodwill Tour 2014

As Marty expands upon his "kinder, gentler" approach by sharing puppy dog and Marie Osmond memes, one has to wonder what precipitated this curious change of lifestyle.

Linda: "I got teased about you at Dunkin' Donuts again and $20 is missing from my purse. I can't take too much more of this.  Who ate my pork rinds? I was planning on eating those for breakfast, damnit!"

Marty: "I swear I can turn this around, starting with my latest address to City Council. Give me another chance, baby. I'll loofah your stretch marks again?  Then we'll hit Lee's Coney and 'Pizza Me'. Those guys owe me for the shout out on Ellen!"

Linda: "We need to talk."

All of the readers here at CoM have expressed their absolute astonishment that any woman would consider Marty for anything more serious than cleaning her windshield at a busy intersection. Why would anyone decide this moronic man child was someone they would want to be in a relationship with? You could never call Linda a gold digger, as Marty is on public assistance and he abandoned the vast Prehn estate when he skipped out on the rent. Marty's entire life is one huge lie so how could he possibly convince a woman to let him move in and feed him? We all know he had to have told some great lies to pull that off. Or maybe Lovely Linda is just as pathetic. Only her father would hire her, so they have that in common. Oh, the ties that bind...

Now that Linda is stuck with a fat, worthless and incredibly stupid superhero, has she finally decided to flex her financial muscle on Marty? Has the pressure placed on Linda to explain Marty's actions, or justify her participation in his scams and threats, forced her to rein in his stupidity? Did she threaten his $80/week paycheck? Is Linda the reason for the latest version of the Depression Dawg?

We first noticed the change in Marty shortly after fear of confrontation by Marty's foe caused Linda to become physically ill. Was this the event that forced her to give Marty an ultimatum? "Leave those people alone or find a new place to live, you idiot." Denying Marty lived with her and claiming they aren't a couple didn't work so is forcing Marty to change his lying, threatening ways the next step? How long can the Mongoose keep up his charitable nice guy act before the real Marty comes out again?

This blog is officially predicting that it won't last long at all.  The only thing Marty has going for him is consistency. He fails at everything, lies about anything and is despised by everyone.

Perhaps Papa Fergan will step up to the plate and save his little girl, the business and whatever is left of the family name soon.
 
Or not.  "Marty's Carquest" does have a certain ring to it...

Good Morning, Linda...

Marty Prehn's Latest Persona Grab Bag

There is a saying in life some people use: Change is Inevitable, especially with our favorite idiot, Marty Prehn. It seems that there is a different Mongoose for any occasion, complete with a themed hat.  

Now if Linda could just get him to change his underwear...

At the latest State of the Mongoose address to Monday's Saint Clair Shores City Council, the newest incarnation of Marty was unveiled. As is his pattern, Marty changes every time the season does. He became an "Advocate for the Public" with his vast knowledge of deed restrictions this past summer. He claimed to be leading the fight in the great Berkley parking crusade, all while serving as a Guardian Angel for a man who didn't know or want to have anything to do with Marty. Now that the leaves and temperatures are falling, it was time for a new version of Marty to magically appear where he's neither invited or welcome.

As Marty addressed the council this week, complete with props, a new kinder, gentler Mongoose was introduced. There were no attacks, code enforcement claims, not even a mention of cyber stalkers. This is a drastic change from what we usually get from Marty. I can't help but accredit this new tactic to Linda. After Robin approached Linda about Marty's claims that included her, Linda became so scared it made her physically sick. This, from a woman who shares her bathroom with Marty, so you know she was pretty nauseous. I'm of the opinion that Marty's meal ticket laid down the law and told Marty to quit attacking people because it was now affecting her. There has also been a new effort by Marty to give the appearance that he no longer lives at Linda's. He even claimed at the council meeting that he now lives in Eastpointe. Sorry Marty and Linda, you're not fooling anyone with that. After waddling up to the microphone, does it surprise anyone here that the first words out of his mouth is a complete lie?

As luck would have it, there was another suicide walk scheduled for the weekend following the great event weekend he had planned but didn't bother to show up for. This gave Marty the chance to become a full fledged National Suicide Prevention Advocate. He just continued on with his OPA fundraising and a new national goal of raising a million dollars. This would allow Marty to expand out of Macomb, a county that has grown quite tired of his craziness, with his new persona. We all know Marty is a master at coming up with catchy names for all of his events and his own superhero greatness. Now that Elder Dawg and Elder Avenger don't apply to his newest crusade, we're left to speculate as to what his latest moniker will be. Here are a few possibilities complete, with what their "good work superpower" will be:

Suicide Avenger©:
This superhero will be on constant lookout for suicide victims to exploit. He'll scan all the local newspapers looking for recent suicides so he can can start trying to contact the survivors with his offers to aid them. When he is shunned and unable to exploit anyone, his superpower will take over. He'll research police and autopsy reports looking for details he can use to inflict added pain on the victims for his revenge.

Depression Dawg©:
A distant cousin to McGruff and the younger litter mate of Elder Dawg, this canine will battle depression. A tail wagging dog that's excited to see you will cheer up almost anyone and Depression Dawg will serve basically the same purpose. He'll promise depressed people, especially single women, luxury box tickets to sporting events, flower delivery, and other gimmicks to lift their spirits. He will write songs in their honor and make arraignments for them to meet Dr Phil for counseling sessions. Depression Dawg's superpower will be begging for food and leaving piles of crap everywhere. Marty has been honing those skills for years now. With great power comes great responsibility, you know...

Bully Buster©:
Bully Buster will lead the fight against bullying by forming state and national task forces with every elected official, dead or alive, he can remember. He'll direct new legislation to make bullying a federal offense with a 20 year prison sentence. Buster's superpower will be attacking the teenage female children of anyone he doesn't like, thus educating them as to how to spot that little bitch who spread lies about you after math class. "What a bitch, I'm sure..."

Out of the Dark Knight©:
Marty pointed out the number of overdoses while talking about suicide. This can only mean that he feels those overdoses were depression related and a form of suicide. This superhero will seek out the families of overdose victims to comfort and convince them that the overdose wasn't the result of drug addiction, but in reality a suicide - or perhaps murder (another hero we'll discuss in a later article). The Knight's superpower will be investigating the drug dealer who caused the suicide by going undercover and simply keeping an eye on his son for once. After confirming that Jr wasn't the dealer, the Knight will be the driving force that gets the supplier prosecuted for murder and sentenced to 20 years in a federal penitentiary, likely under the Homeland Security Act that Marty co wrote.

Whatever iteration of a lying, scamming free loader this new superhero will be, underneath the cape we'll still find a moronic and extremely immature man-child who just can't get anyone to notice his greatness. 

Marty Prehn's Mongeese

As our award winning coverage of all things Marty continues, and his support system all but decimated, we here at CoM thought we should highlight a few of the people involved with Marty's campaign of hate and incessant FBI threats. As you know, Marty refuses to act like a man and support himself. For over twenty years he has moved from one enabler to the next in his quest to live off of the hard work of others. As long as Marty continues to find victims to use and exploit, he has no reason to stop what he does. Here are a few of his most recent enablers.

This is Linda Fergan Bowery. As of this writing, Linda is responsible for housing and feeding the Mongoose. Marty has been squatting in her apartment the last six months. Although it can't be completely verified, I have to believe she considers herself to be Marty's girlfriend. Why else would anyone let someone as vile and disgusting as Marty move in? It's commonly thought that love is blind and people see what they want to see.  I have to believe that is what is happening here.  Then again, perhaps Linda is just a Bridge Card gold digger.


Marty has been successful at manipulating certain people for a while now. It started with his father and the list continues to grow. When Guy helped Marty get a part time job with a local auto supply store, the owner's daughter quickly moved up on Marty's To-Do list. How long did it take him to convince Linda of what a great and honorable man he claims he is? Now that she let him con his way into her life and apartment, is she unaware of what he does or simply refuses to see it? Does she realize she provides him with the key tools he needs to attack and scam his victims? Marty uses her iPhone and WiFi early every morning to spew, search for new victims and read this very blog. Does Marty sneak her phone every morning or do they do it together? In bed over cold pizza?


Next we'll mention Tom Fergan. He is Linda's father and, as the owner of Carquest, Marty's boss. Mr Fergan originally hired Marty as a favor to a good customer of his, Guy, the owner of Primo's Collision. After Guy finally became aware of what type of person Marty really is, he tried to warn Tom. Unfortunately it was too late. Marty had already moved in with Linda and burrowed into that family like a tick. Mr Fergan turned a blind eye to what people were trying to tell him about Marty, in spite of Marty making a play to have a family member committed to a mental hospital.


My questions about Mr Fergan, who seems nice and successful enough, are these: Does Tom know Marty uses company computers to harass people? Does he care that Marty vows to put a good Carquest customer out of business and have the owner deported? Now that Marty has become an actual physical stalker, does Mr Fergan realize he supplies Marty with the vehicle to stalk his victims? Videos of Marty circling people's place of employment and homes while driving the Carquest delivery vehicle have been made. Could this activity be linked back to Carquest and they be held responsible for what Marty is doing on company time in a company vehicle? We might soon find out.

No article about Marty's enablers would be complete without mentioning this woman. Florence Iverson (Flo) is Marty's greatest supporter. We aren't sure how long she has been giving Marty financial support but it's been a long time. Marty has her conned into thinking her funds are going towards all the great things he does for society. She wouldn't even consider the possibility that she's basically financing a total loser who has never done anything to benefit anyone other than himself, let alone being "elder abused" herself. She is so brainwashed by Marty that she reads the fetid puss he spews on Facebook and comments in support of it.


History tells us that Flo is a lost cause when it come to Marty. I still hold out hope that the Fergans will wake up to who they are supporting and helping. Will they figure out they are being used by Marty? If they ever do, how will they get rid of him? Is it already too late to mitigate the damage Marty is doing to their reputations? Will they stop supporting Marty's antics before he causes them actual legal problems? Stay tuned because you know we'll be reporting on it.

Marty Prehn's 'Chicken Bucket Challenge'

I'm sure by now all of our readers have seen a video of someone taking the "Ice Bucket Challenge". This challenge, motivated to raise funds and awareness for ALS, has gone viral and you see more people doing it every day. Now that this trend has exploded, we here at CoM are waiting for the Mongoose to jump in head first with a new money raising scam of his own. When will we see a "Chicken Bucket Challenge"? 


As Marty continues to have his civil right of free speech "tamped down" by Facebook, he's had plenty of time to watch YouTube videos and work on his fundraising. Now that his sobbing video to a paroled incarcerated soldier has disappeared from Linda's page, will it soon be replaced with Marty's next attempt to draw attention to himself?


It's only a matter of time before Marty tries to seize upon the great popularity and fundraising potential of a bucket challenge. Of course, Marty's challenge will have to have the Elder Dawg's unique spin. Pouring ice cold water over his head just doesn't seem like Marty's style. That's too much work for him, not to mention NOBODY wants to see his wet T-shirt. Besides, someone could sneak some soap in the water. This is why we predict Marty's next scam could be the Chicken Bucket Challenge. 


In the Ice Bucket Challenge, participants are supposed to donate $10 to charity, pour ice cold water over their head and then challenge three others to do the same. Marty's challenge would be similar in concept but geared more towards his selfish needs. He will ask people to donate $10 to his good works, send him a bucket of chicken, then challenge three others to do likewise. Pure Mongoose Brilliance!


This challenge would serve so many purposes for Marty it's a no brainer, which is a requirement for anything he does. It would get his donations rolling again and tide him over until his Bridge Card is refilled for the month! A few buckets of chicken a day would go a long way to satisfy his need to steal Slim Jims from 7-11 plus reduce the natural hostility between him and Linda when the fridge is emptied daily. 


The Chicken Bucket Challenge would appeal to so many different causes, it can't possibly fail. Against elder abuse? Send $10 and a bucket. Upset about neighborhood parking? Take the challenge. Since the list of causes Marty advocates for is endless, so would the amount of people willing to accept this challenge. Veterans, deed restrictions, cyber bullying, human trafficking, civil rights or even his most recent blanket advocacy title - plain old "Public Advocate". The possibilities are endless. 


Who of Marty's good friends will he challenge first? Ellen could kick of this campaign on her show. Maybe have the Governor send Marty his first bucket. Sylvester Stallone? Absolutely. Perhaps Marty can get Paula Deen to actually cook the first bucket herself? With the national fame of the Mongoose, this challenge can't help but go viral. Marty will have buckets of chicken pouring in from all over the country, not to mention the cash donations. 


The best part of this challenge is it will segue into Marty's next great fundraiser. After gorging on chicken for the next few weeks, Marty will put on plenty of extra pounds. This will be a great transition to either his Weight Watchers challenge or his desperate need for a pacemaker, as he's been dying for two years without one. The sky truly is the limit.

Oh, and should you accept this challenge, be certain to also send mashed potatoes with plenty of gravy...

Sleepy Suburb Rocked by Marty Prehn's "Meet and Greet"

As Macomb County deputies and Eastpointe law enforcement are called in for crowd control, it's "standing room only" at Marty Prehn's Meet and Greet and Flip Phone showing of "Justice 4 Jean".

Media is instructed not to ask questions regarding tomorrow's trial strategy.

Marty Prehn: Nonsense Server

It's another great day here at CoM. It's Friday again and as all of you CoMmies know, that can only mean one thing. Yes, you guessed correctly, it's once again Flameout Friday©!   [queue laughter SOT]

Marty got a head start on Flameout Friday© this week. He actually got started on Thursday night. For the sake of saving bandwidth, I'll summarize his comments from before midnight first.

Marty posted a mysterious comment on Big Vexi's page last night referencing some sad news. After being totally ignored by the Lawless Lemmings, Big Vexi was forced to comment. The big sad news was Sean Fleming being served to appear at a Personal Protection Order (PPO) hearing on the 6th that Marty claims somehow involves him. As to be expected from our moronic Special Agent, Marty couldn't resist staking a claim to being a key player in this non event.

Marty Prehn
"Bill you should see how long the arms are of this process server. I wonder if this is where the term THE LONG ARM OF THE LAW COMES FROM? Hopefully criminal charges will be added as well both at the local, state and federal levels."

As you can see, Marty will claim to be whatever fits the moment. When did Marty become a process server? I can't help but see this comment as Marty trying to claim he is the person who served Sean. We all know that's not true. The only thing Marty serves is himself another plate full of food at a funeral buffet for someone he doesn't know.

The great news that Marty's hero and man crush had served Sean seemed to send Marty off into his fantasy world yet again. He begain posting comments on Big Vexi's page throughout the night. The more he commented, the more involved and important he became. You see Marty's standard claims surface in this comment:

Marty Prehn
"Sort of like a scene out of the movie JAWS. Looks like we are going to need a bigger courtroom as it will be over owing with media and witnesses and court watchers. Press conference scheduled for 12 noon. In front of the courthouse or maybe in front of the sheriffs office and get a statement from Oakland County Sheriff Michael Bouchard about going after and prosecuting cyber stalkers."

This simple PPO hearing for a man from Texas against Sean Fleming, who lives in Detroit, has suddenly grown so large it won't fit in a courtroom. Marty's typical claim of great media coverage has gotten so old. The local media he stalks while trying to get his name in the news, consider him the village idiot. I can't say I would disagree with them.

My favorite part of this Marty spew is his claiming there will be a press conference. As Marty's usual press conference location is unavailable due to an unresolved Slim Jim debt at 7-11, he's naturally confused about where he'll address the media hoard that will be begging for a statement from the Mongoose. It'll either be in front of the courthouse or the Sheriff's Department. I hope he updates this statement when he finalizes the location. I'd hate for Big Vexi to miss it, otherwise that would leave Marty standing alone somewhere and he won't even be able to drown his sorrows with a Slurpee.

After Marty is unable to get any form of a reaction from the Lawless Lemmings because even they can recognize complete bullshit when they see it, he takes his manic rants to his own page. Marty blessed us with this post:

Marty Prehn
"Is there a difference between a going to be and a wanna be? Sean D. Fleming is going to be EXPOSED FOR THE CYBER STALKER THAT HE IS on Wednesday August 6, 2014 at 1:30 pm at the Oakland County Courthouse. If you live in the area please attend a news conference at 12 pm with myself and Nikl Windsor and other victims of this emotionally disturbed individual and his other cyber stalkers from the hate groups Joey is a little kid and the Marty Prehn Chronicles. I am hoping that Jeff Vaughn, Taryn Asher, Mara MacDonald, Bill Laitner, Jamie Cook and the other Metro Detroit tv stations come and do stories about how this coward of a man has willfully and knowing posted things on the internet with the intention or harassing, stalking and trying to intimidate and humiliate and causing reasonable people to become fearful of their lives including death threats that he latter claims was a challenge to do rap songs along 8 mile and that is what he meant when he said he would TEAR BILL WINDSOR APART WITH HIS BARE HANDS. Looking at Sean D. Fleming reminds me of the character from the Hunchback of Notre Dame and I believe that Bill Windsor will be requesting that Sean D. Fleming be ordered to a mental faculty in Oakland County for a 72 hour mental evaluation because this guy the a whack job just like several other people who post on these hate blogs and law enforcement is now working with us to hold those accountable who cyber stalk and interfere with the personal lives of people on the internet and know no boundaries or what is crossing the line as to what is acceptable behavior and what is free speech and what is hate speech and harassment."

This comment contains many of Marty's standard claims. Death threats, insults, mental evaluations, names of the local media, but one thing is different. He quotes Sean fleming as saying. "TEAR BILL WINDSOR APART WITH HIS BARE HANDS.". Marty had to add the "bare hands" part to make it sound more threatening. I can't remember Marty ever adding words to a quote so it better served his purpose. Has the Mongoose evolved his tactics to the advanced stage of altering another persons words to bolster his claims?

Of course we have another invite to Marty's big press conference with an undetermined location. I picture mobs of people running around Oakland County in search of the great Elder Dog saying a few words.

The most sickening part of this comment is the end. Is Marty really trying to say he knows what acceptable comments on the Internet are. Does this mean it's ok to wish death on your nieces and nephews or mock a 14 year old girl and Marty's perceived and distorted view of how much she should weigh, but pointing out Marty is a dumb ass loser is somehow crossing a line? Only in the demented mind of a never has been, never will be, mooching schmuck.

The most important but fitting comment made during these last few hours of Mongoose spew were provided by a Lawless Lemming. During Marty's victory tour all over Big Vexi's page, we found this:

Sharon Stephens
Who is Marty Prehn???
Yesterday at 11:20pm

It's good to know that in this crazy world we live in, some things never change.  

Sharon, dear, he's the Regional Director and Chief Media Relations Manager/Process Server and star of your upcoming blockbuster movie.

Silly lemming.

The Fleecing of Flo!

Dear CoMmies:  I am pleased to report that the following article is our most popular ever in our eight month existence!  Thank you!

Today is as good as any other time to highlight an example of Marty financially abusing another vulnerable elderly lady. By now our readers should all be familiar with how Marty treated his own mother. He basically ignored her and left her alone in a dark room all day while he spent her money dining out and generally being "Marty'ish"© around the Detroit area - without that pesky 10 hour per week job interfering.

After finally losing access to Bernice's lifetime savings, Marty's lifestyle declined rather quickly. He lost everything he had swindled out of his mother. His refusal to do anything to help himself cost him dearly. After hitting what I'd consider rock bottom - even by Marty's standards - Guy and Robin helped him escape from life on the streets, or more accurately, in the Mongoosmobile©. Unknowing to them, they also supplied Marty with his most important tools for evolving into the scamming liar he is today: Access to a computer with an internet connection. 

With unlimited computer time at the body shop owned by Guy, Marty was free to troll the internet searching for ignorant victims. Enter one Florence Iverson - borderline senile, no children and a government pension - Eureka! We're not sure exactly how or when Marty discovered Florence, but it was his dream come true. In Florence, Marty had found a lonely old woman he could sweet talk and therefore take advantage of. It wasn't long before Marty declared Florence was his new mother and promised her an all expenses paid trip to California to join him on his friend Ellen's show. She'd finally meet him in a grand fashion!

Somehow Marty managed to convince Florence he was a great elder something or another and needed funds to continue preforming his "good works" Florence often refers to. She began mailing him money on a regular basis to help him save the world from Marty's usual list of evil, and his ongoing legal case against his family. Of course, in reality she was funding nothing more than what Marty does best after being obnoxious - EATING!

As is Marty's habit, he couldn't help but brag to people that he has women sending him money. I guess that's just part of the image Marty wants to project. He tried to use the fact that women were sending him funds as proof he was working for the good of mankind, therefore it was ok for others to also donate. A defacto reference, if you will.

Anytime the donations Marty receives become public knowledge, suddenly the denials begin. Florence is no different. A recent comment on Marty's page is a great example of this. 

Florence Iverson

"You have my permission to use my name;calling me SENILE and giving you $50.00 each month? Do they have proof of either?"

Like · 1 · Jul 24 at 8:18am

Ask and you shall receive. Here you go, crazy lady:

As you can see, this letter from Florence to Marty is a warning that Florence won't be able to send money as often as she did LAST YEAR! "Next year the money will be sporadic...". Wouldn't that imply that the money was sent on a regular schedule the previous year? 

Based on the quantity of envelopes from Florence found in the trash placed on the curb after the fumigation of the Mongoose Lair, letters to Marty arrived quite often. Something tells me these envelopes weren't just correspondence letters sent to wish Marty a great day. With all the Facebook comments between these two, not to mention the assumed phone calls, why would two or more letters a month plus several packages be needed? I think we all know the answer to this question. 

The part of this letter that sickens me is the fact that Florence felt the need to provide Marty with an explanation for not being able to send money as often. How much pressure has Marty been putting on this elderly lady to send more money? It's obvious Marty expected to receive it every month. How many phone calls has Florence received from Marty asking if his check is in the mail? Or better yet, how many times has Marty called Florence and said "I'm going to need more money this month"? What reasons has Marty been giving Florence for a grown man to need an allowance from this surrogate mother who he's never even met in person?

This letter is just another example of Marty taking advantage of the people he claims to fight for. Florence just blindly believes Marty is using her money for good causes. In reality, if she ever asked Marty for proof of his "good works" he'd be at a total loss and would likely begin attacking her just like he does Robin & Guy today. I can't help but wonder just how deeply Marty has managed to embed himself in Florence's finances. She's not going to live forever and must have quite a bit socked away. Another concern I have is how many other, local or otherwise, "mommys" Marty has that we don't know about? How does Linda feel about these elderly women sending Marty money? Does she not know or is she in on it and that's what attracted her to him in the first place, as they chuckle about it over a couple of tubes of raw cookie dough?

From the looks of things, once again it's obvious Marty spells ATM M-O-M!

Wake up, Florence. Have someone show you how to use a browser properly. You've been reading that same CoM page for weeks now...

Coming Soon:The Fleecing of Flo

Marty's Thursday Threat Down© Recap

Dear CoMmies and fans of extreme idiocy worldwide;

Coverage of Marty Prehn's stupidity is a tough job, but someone's got to do it.  After all, that's why we're paid the big bucks! We've certainly earned it this week.

Out of total frustration, Marty has adopted a new strategy. One he apparently picked up from his "co crime fighter" Marti Oakley. He's figured out that ignoring us just wasn't getting the results he wanted and we wouldn't go away. The new plan must be to totally overwhelm us with stupidity and try to bog down our internet. As we were trying to recover from the side splitting laughter Marty provided on Wednesday, he blindsided us with his Thursday Threat Down©. Here is how he started his Thursday morning:

Marty Prehn
Thu · Edited · 
"NOW IS THE TIME and the TIME IS NOW. Keep August 5th and 6th open as this is when the fireworks will take place in Macomb and Oakland County. Come and meet myself and Bill Windsor as we find Justice against those that have trespassed against us with slander and libel. Sean D. Fleming will be EXPOSED for being the cyber stalker that he is and how the other members of the Joey is a Little Kid HATE blog group will be held accountable for their illegal cyber stalking activities and those that have posted on the Marty Prehn Chronicles and conspired to try to intimidate, harass, tamper and threaten me as a witness in the domestic violence case that I am a victim of and for also being a victim of a retaliation eviction as demonstrated under MCL 600. Furthermore a victim under the legal terms of revenge behavior using the internet and under the darkness or cover of anonymous postings of slander and libel against myself, my friends and my family. If you want to come to a planned event and meet myself and Bill Windsor please contact me at mprehn2004@yahoo.com or call me at 1 586 563 0989. JUSTICE 4 JEAN by David Schied will be shown and Court watchers are being asked for to attend the case against cyber stalker Sean D. Fleming on August 6, 2014 at 1:30 pm at the Oakland County Circuit Court at 1200 Telegraph Road in Pontiac, Michigan. I will be a testifying witness at this criminal hearing at Bill Windsor's request. The charges will be for aggravated cyber stalking and domestic internet terrorism and if found GUILTY is a prison sentence of up to 5 years and fines and costs and restitution. Hope to see you there."

Marty claims "now is the time, the time is now" referencing a date two weeks away. And of course another reference to upcoming fireworks. In the last two weeks, Marty has promised more fireworks than China could dream to manufacture for the Year of the Mongoose! This time he's promising fireworks to be fired off by someone else, so maybe they'll actually happen. For some reason I still doubt it. After all, Marty is involved. Let's be blunt here: Everything he touches fails.

The upcoming fireworks Marty is hyping are actually a hearing for a PPO request by Big Vexi on Sean Fleming. It has nothing to do with Marty, or for that matter, this blog. But as is Marty's usual pattern, he's even hijacked someone else's PPO hearing. Suddenly this hearing is all about the Mongoose. Marty says: "Come and meet myself and Bill Windsor...". The man who is actually responsible for the hearing can't even get top billing? Everyone should flock to Oakland County, Michigan to meet Marty and his second banana sidekick, Big Vexi.

Marty next goes on to exclaim "we" will find justice. How exactly is Marty finding justice if this PPO is granted? All Marty is really doing is trying to take credit for someone else's work. And in typical Marty form, he seems to think this PPO is going to apply to anyone who posts on this blog as well. Is this man really that dumb? Never mind, we all already know that answer.

The part of this I still don't understand is, where was all this hype when Marty was obtaining his PPO against Mr Fleming? Someone else files a PPO request against Sean and it becomes a two day extravaganza before it's ever granted. Where was the parade when Marty's requests in both Oakland and Macomb Counties were supposedly granted? Why is Marty so giddy about a hearing when he claims he already succeeded in getting two PPO's himself? Could it be because that was just another Marty lie?

I'll just skip over Marty's standard lie about his retaliation eviction and intimidating a domestic violence witness crap. We all know the truth about that and I'm sure everyone is as tired of hearing it as I am.

As Marty turns this simple hearing into another of his incredible "events", he drops his email and phone number. This is so anyone who might want to attend can contact him. Is he selling tickets? Is a donation to Marty required for someone to attend a court hearing? Has the hearing been moved to the Lakeview High auditorium? If so, he'll need everyone to send him a minimum of $5.00 through PayPal. And once again, he gives himself top billing. We know who packs the star power in Detroit!

My favorite part of this latest pile of Elder Dawg crap is how as Marty types, this PPO hearing suddenly becomes a criminal trial, with Marty as the star witness. He claims if Mr Fleming is found guilty at - I remind you, a PERSONAL PROTECTION ORDER HEARING THAT WOULD COVER SEAN FLEMING'S INDISCRETIONS FROM THAT DAY FORWARD - he'll be sentenced to five years in prison. Will somebody please clue this idiot in as to how these things work? Marty's complete ignorance is starting to make my head hurt.

I'll wrap up this latest recap of Marty's moronic spew with this: If Big Vexi has any hope of succeeding in this upcoming hearing, he should have Marty restrained a few miles from the courtroom. Prepay a few meals at Dimitri's or something. If Marty is present, or God forbid, testifies, this PPO request is doomed. Not only is Marty a proven liar many, many times over, he's so stupid that if he's involved, Big Vexi and Marty could leave that courtroom with Protection Orders against themselves, not dissimilar to what happened with Marty and his brother Richard in 2010.

Oh, and Marty:  You still owe the court $150 bucks for that little exercise in futility...

Marty Prehn's Hump Day Histrionics©!

As our readers here at CoM well know, we love a good old fashioned Marty meltdown. As much as we enjoyed Flameout Friday©, Marty put it to shame Wednesday morning. Marty produced a rant for the ages which can only be classified as our very first Hump Day Histrionic©! The sheer mass of his spew is so overwhelming that it can't possibly be covered in one article. We will start with this opening load of crap for now:

Marty Prehn 3:23am · Edited · "The same can be said of my father's remains as my emotionally disturbed sister from Colorado conspired with the girlfriend of the landlord's son in St. Clair Shores and bought my father's ashes from her to take back to Colorado. They were stolen from the home that I was renting and were illegally obtained via a retaliation eviction on March 1, 2014. This is known as a fraud by conversion and is a federal felony and carries a 10 year prison sentence not to mention the removal of a cremated body across state lines. Time for the FBI to get involved in both cases." 

As you can see by the time stamp on this comment, Marty got off to an early start. Perhaps Linda's horse-like snoring kept him awake, or he was up late giving browser use lessons to Florence in exchange for his monthly check. It seems that Marty is once again calling for the FBI to pursue his sister for doing what any good child and legal representative would do with a parent's remains. While he's bringing in his big gun coworkers again, he includes his alleged retaliation eviction as a logical additional bonus charge for them to jump on . Last time I checked, the FBI really doesn't get involved in civil matters, especially when they involve a roomful of garbage and, let's be honest here, it's really just another one of his delusions and the total dollar amount that could possibly be ascribed to it is a few hundred bucks - and Marty owes it to his former landlord! You would think a retired FBI Special Agent would know that. 

Of course this little spew is tame by Marty standards. He could type that one handed while cramming cold pizza in his face with the other. But have no fear, he was just getting started: 

Marty Prehn "My estranged sister's name is Marlene Nelson-Rhoades and the landlord's names are Augustina and Giovani Moceri and their son's name is Gaetano (Guy) Moceri and his girlfriend's name is Robin Heaps Williams. TMZ has contacted me and wants to come and do a sit down interview with me to discuss how a simple domestic violence situation on December 22, 2013 has expanded out to several federal felonies that will cause the landlord's son to be deported back to his birth origin of Sicily for a felony conviction. Other than emotionally and possibly mentally ill people who does stuff like this? Edited · Like · 1 · Today at 3:49am" 

Yes, you read that right, he said TMZ, the TV gossip show and website, wanted to interview him. The local media just isn't big enough for a man as great as Marty. No mere newspaper story can capture the star power of the Mongoose. He needs a crew that will chase the story, get the dirt and take the pictures! I'm sure TMZ is going to add a True Crimes Against Idiots segment to its show. They could squeeze it in between Kim Kardashian's latest ass picture and a backstage interview with Carrot Top! I only hope Linda is prepared for the sure to follow paparazzi crush in front of her apartment. Carquest will be the media center of Eastpointe after the story of Marty's skipping out on his rent - I mean "retaliation eviction" - hits the national late night star chasing scene. The best part of this rant is the end: 

"Other than emotionally and possibly mentally ill people who does stuff like this?" 

I'll answer your question Marty. Only mentally ill idiots would possibly claim TMZ has contacted a loser nobody in Detroit about your BS story. I'm glad you finally figured out what your problem is. Admitting it is the first step. Next step would be to seek treatment for your various mental ailments. 

Stay tuned CoMmies. There is so much more to cover, but your humble correspondent feels the overwhelming need to shower after reading his crap.

Marty Prehn's Head Explodes!

Stay tuned to this blog for in depth coverage and analysis. 

Marty Prehn: Not Ready For Prime Time

As another day passes in the life of our beloved moron Marty, I thought we should cover Marty's next great fame attempt. The latest, greatest Marty moment has arrived. He'll be hosting an NBC television show about Elder Abuse. Here are some of the comments Marty has made as he begins to hype his next event:


"Marty Prehn Hey TEAM Chism I am thinking it is time we had a CHISM reunion sometime in the near future. Do you remember Dan Haggerty form the tv show Grizzly Adams? I got to meet his about 4 weeks ago and he is the neatest guy and wants to come back to Michigan to do a nationally televised tv program on elder and guardianship abuse. I will keep you posted. I LOVE you hSteve Chism and Laurie Meagher and Susan Lucier and Curt Chism. TEAM CHISM ROCKS!"

Like Mongoosapalooza I and II before it, Marty's NBC Special on Elder Abuse seems to be going the way of Justice 4 Jr - another non event.

After Marty once again gets ignored by "Team Chism" he makes yet another attempt to get at least a good Elder Dawg pat on the head:

"Marty Prehn If it ain't from Del Taco it ain't food. GO TEAM CHISM. Hey do the 4 of you want to meet Dan Haggerty aka Grizzly Adams and Betty White in person on a NBC nationally televised program called SAVING THE LIFE OF ARMY VET JIM CHISM? I told you it was going to happen I just did not know when and now I do"

Suddenly Betty White has been added to this television show and it has now become a tribute to Team Chism's alleged saving of their father. More desperation by the Mongoose to get any response from the only people who have ever claimed he was anything more than a worthless loser. I can only assume they figure Marty is contacting them to beg for money so they ignore him like a Jehovah's Witness at your front door. 

Florence is already on borrowed time and Linda has had just about enough of his lies, cons, theft and smell. With his hours at Carquest cut to ten or less per week and 7-11 breathing down his neck for unpaid junk food, Marty is running out of ideas.

This is not his first foray into television. We all remember his TV series that was to start airing last fall:

"Marty Prehn shared Brenda Battle Jordan's photo.
Oct 3 · 
Think of me as the John Walsh of Elder and Guardianship Abuse and if you financially exploit a vulnerable adult we will be coming after you. Looks like America's MOST WANTED tv producers are interested in doing a pilot program to see what kind of viewing response they will get. This should be interesting. California here I come."

Perhaps his address to the Saint Clair Shores City Council will make next season's "America's Funniest Videos".

As is Marty's style, he also has to try to parlay his chance encounter with an older TV actor into bigger and better things. We all know Marty could never pass up a chance to name drop his way into contact with another public figure. We found this comment Marty left for Doris Roberts from "Everybody Loves Raymond":

"Marty Prehn - Doris Roberts I had the pleasure of meeting a friend of yours Dan Haggerty aka Grizzly Adams and suggested that you be included in a national tv show regarding exposing the abuses going on across the country in elder and guardianship abuse cases. I can be contacted at 1 586 563 0989. Have your agent give me a call to see what date works best with your busy schedule. Thanks"

Another feeble attempt by Marty to get any kind of attention from anyone other than Linda and debt collectors. In his comment to one of the members of Team Chism he says he finally knows the date of the TV show. Yet in this comment to Doris, he needs to know what dates she is available. Am I the only one who thinks that's odd? I'm sure Ms Roberts agent will be calling any day now to "save the date" with Marty. 

Our crack CoM operatives immediately sprang into action upon hearing this big news. Mr Haggerty was contacted through proper channels and asked about his upcoming appearance on Marty's TV show. As is the case when anyone is asked about Marty, we got the standard answer: "MARTY WHO?" It's good to know nothing ever changes in the life of Marty. 

I'll leave you with these questions to ponder: How many aging actors has Marty sent the same type comment he posted for Ms Roberts? How does Dan Haggerty feel about getting photo bombed by Marty now that his name is being dropped like hot potatoes all over Internet? Will Team Chism ever let Marty play with them again? And most importantly, what designer did Marty promise Linda her red carpet dress would be made by?

My money is on Coleman Tents...