Where Oh Where is Whittle Marty

Now that it's been over a week since the lynching of the Mongoose at the SCS city council meeting, Marty has remained in hiding. There have been no attack posts on his Facebook page. He hasn't announced a new advocacy cause or fundraiser scam. Marty hasn't even updated his fans about how well the benefit for Erica that he and The Hip Replacements put on this past weekend went. Maybe Elder Dawg collected so much money that he's still busy trying to count it. After a week of nothing from Marty, I have to borrow a song he wrote once. "Where oh where has whittle Marty gone? Oh where oh where could he be?"

During Marty's rebuttal of all the "allegations" presented to the council about him, he promised several things. Marty said he wasn't going to go into details about Erica's claims of him trying to hijack Wyatt's law and him posing as her agent. He instead was going to take it up with the newspapers. After checking with all the Detroit area newspapers, I've been unable to find any indication that there is an article pending about Marty in any way. Not even Marty's "good friend" Jamie Cook is working on a story to defend the good name of the Mongoose. Did Marty decide to have mercy on Erica and call off the hit piece about her that was destined for the front page of USA Today? That's the only explanation I can come up with for why the nation's press didn't rise up to correct the wrongs perpetrated against their beloved Elder Avenger.

During Marty's name dropping rebuttal to the council, he mentioned his recent favorite threat. Marty claimed he was having the Michigan AG's office involve the Michigan State Police in the investigation of the outrageous false claims against him. I'm sure by now there are teams of investigators working to arrest the criminal cyber stalkers who would dare point out Marty's own words and actions and use them to discredit his superhero reputation. It's a good thing the state of Michigan has an AG dedicated to protecting the good Mongoose name on a daily basis. I can't imagine the depth our great country would sink to if the luster of the Martin E Prehn name were to be dimmed. If world leaders will go to the trouble of changing decades of Cold World policies after Ronald Reagan spent one day with "Dimples Prehn", prosecuting Marty's detractors is the least the AG can do.

I've now begun scanning all the Detroit area television station news sites searching for Marty's next advocacy cause. We all know by now that Marty's advocacy is determined by what story might draw some media coverage. Maybe we haven't heard from the Mongoose because he doesn't want to tip anyone off to where he's going to be fundraising next. Or has Marty been called out of FBI retirement for a top secret undercover assignment? You know, once a Special Agent, always a Special Agent. Marty's unwavering dedication to protecting our country from evil takes priority over everything, except maybe sitting in the 7-11 parking lot staring at Primo's. Even a top secret undercover agent has to have his priorities.

Now that the SCS city council has told Marty to "stay the hell away", what the next move for the Mongoose? Will he find a new forum for pronouncing his great good works and attacking his cyber stalkers? Or will he use his standard approach and just pretend it didn't happen? How long will Marty stay tamped down before he comes back with a new advocacy scam and victims? Is Linda Fergan Bowery trying to rebuild the Elder Dawg's spirit so he can once again attempt to get donations rolling in order to help pay their enormous food bill? Will FERGAN'S Carquest continue to support Marty and all of his stalking endeavors? Stay tuned for the latest breaking news about Marty, you know it won't be long until his stupidity resumes.

Marty Prehn Goes Up In Flames

As the days pass since the arrest of Marty's hero, Bill Windsor, it appears The Mongoose continues to burrow deeper underground. Are we witnessing the end of The Elder Avenger as we know him? Has fear of arrest finally stopped Marty's greatness? Has Linda neutered the Elder Dawg? She certainly doesn't let him play with her iPhone anymore. Shudder to think what else he's forbidden to play with. It would seem that all of these factors play a part in the disappearance of our beloved idiot.

As the calendar changed to October this year, Marty was riding high. Coming off his latest Facebook suspension, he went on a posting frenzy. He was so busy on Facebook, his excitement at posting even spilled over onto Linda's page. Who could forget his reposting of the word OPA over and over and over, never quite understanding how to post a Google search of OPA-related crap. October was setting up to be the "Month of the Mongoose". There were several charity walks Marty had done his best to hijack. His newly imagined charity, OPA/Nautical Smile was a great success in his feeble little mind. Bill Windsor had taken over threatening Marty's enemies with his frivolous Texas lawsuit. Marty was still announcing upcoming breaking news about different Robin Williams tributes and updates that, true to Marty form, never happened. In short, it was pretty much business as usual for the worthless fake advocate. Unfortunately, things would take a drastic turn for Marty at the end of his month of charity greatness.

On October 28th, Big Vexi was scheduled for his latest vexatious lie fest in his Texas lawsuit. With the Lawless Lemmings, including Marty, cheering him on, Windsor charged into court ready to tell any lie necessary to get his revenge on his "cyber stalkers". This was one day Marty should have predicted "fireworks" because there were several that day. An unmanned Antares rocket carrying NASA's Cygnus CRS Orb-3 resupply mission to the International Space Station explodes seconds after taking off from the Mid-Atlantic Regional Spaceport in Virginia. Oh, and Bill Windsor and Lawless America exploded, too. Now that, faithful readers, are some noteworthy fireworks!

Past behavior would dictate that Marty would be leading the charge to free this innocent man, what with all his contacts into the Texas Attorney General's office and all.  But no, the Mongoose is laying low this time.

Why, you may ask?  I'll tell you my theory.  Marty Prehn is a two-bit con man, too stupid to actually be successful at it. He aspired to attain the infamy of Bill Windsor, as Windsor had a few bucks to invest in his scams. All Marty really has is a fistful of business cards paid for by Florence Iverson. Coupled with borrowed internet access, Marty's tools of the trade are fairly limited. His silly hat intimidates no one. His fake friends still say "Marty who?". In fact, he can't add Facebook friends fast enough to keep up with the "unfriend" demand.

Marty Prehn's days of terrorizing family, former landlords and just about everyone he meets are numbered.