Marty Prehn's Tools of the Idiot Trade

Good times are here again, CoMmies! There has been a great new development with the biggest idiot the world has ever seen. Apparently Marty's high tech government flip phone finally bit the dust recently. I'm sure the remains of the Mongoose Special Agent flip is currently in route to the Smithsonian for future public display. There couldn't possibly be a more important artifact in the history of our great country. Think of how many heads of state, elected officials, pizza delivery drivers and phone sex operators that phone has called collect! History, my dear friends. History, indeed.

Some here might be wondering why I'm so happy Marty has finally caught up to the technical abilities of your average 12 year old. Think about how easy it will be for the Mongoose to now post his lies, photobombs, worthless threats, name drops, and overall complete stupidity! We'll have months of new entertainment for all of our loyal readers. We're already counting the anticipated advertising revenue from Google!

Marty has wasted no time in getting started spewing his idiocy. As soon as he got his sausage fingers on his new phone, he began filling Facebook with his lies and threats. There are already so many, I couldn't possibly cover them all. But let the hilarity begin!

"Marty Prehn
My sadness turned to joy as I received a really nice phone that ties in with my work as a Special Agent and a Committee member of the best Damn Cruise on Gratiot. They even have my code name engraved in silver on the front face of the phone and starts to tell the last karaoke song that I had done. It reads in abbreviated letters SPECIAL AGENT MARTIN or SAM and the last song I had sung before my passing."

As if this one comment alone isn't enough to laugh for days about, there is so much more. I won't bother commenting about this moronic spew because there are other great examples of how full of crap the Elder Dawg is. Take this comment as Exhibit A.:

"Marty Prehn
With my new phone I can send photos of my Memorial Day project which turned into a 9 day sabbatical up in heaven which by the way is 183.5 miles from Detroit.
Like · 1 · More · 8 hours ago

Marty Prehn
I put together the Michigan Headquarters For The Michigan chapter of the HEY U.G.L.Y. 501C3 AND THE international headquarters for the MVP PRODUCTION COMPANY AND the Roscommon County offices for constituents relations for The Governor of Michigan Rick Snyder, the Michigan Attorney General Bill Schuette, the Michigan Secretary of State Ruth Johnson and the office of Mid Michigan Chapter of Crime Stoppers and my friend and State Representative Pete Lucido."

For the first time in my short career, Marty has filled one statement with so much bullshit, I'm speechless. A new 501c3 charity, international headquarters for MVP productions, state offices for elected officials. I'm in Marty stupidity overload. If these statements are any indication of things to come, this job just got even easier. I can't even bring myself to post the latest Mongoose threats and insults aimed at Flemshady. It's just more than this reporter can take.

Before I pass out from laughing at how stupid Marty continues to make himself look, I'll close this article with a comment of Marty's that I have a question about:

"Marty Prehn
Carla what is the name of that Florida bird that has that big pouch for a neck and gobbles fish and stores the fish in that pouch? Look at some photos of Flem Shady And Tell Me That He Does Not Look Like A Fricken PELICAN with severe acme problem."

I have to ask Marty this final question. Is that thing where your chin is supposed to end what you're referring to in that comment?

Thanks for the laughs, you mindless twit. I am so looking forward to what you come up with next, you moron...