How would you like to carelessly spend your days DOING NOTHING BUT EATING?
Forget about work. Forget about giving your son any semblance of guidance. Forget about paying bills, filing income taxes and all those other pesky details of a normal life. A typical day in Marty's life, by following his charges to his mother's bank account, unfolds as follows:
Day One:
Head out to his favorite restaurant called Dimitri's Family Dining and eat a family-sized breakfast and lunch. Tell stories to owner for hours on end about how he and Ronald Reagan saved the world from the Klingons.
After his meal(s), he gases up the Mongoose Mobile and heads to his next stop: Duke's Liquor Store!
No one should drink on a less than full stomach, so it's a quick stop to pick up a snack at GS Pizza, (before hitting the drive through at Burger King) and it's back to his mother's house in time to watch Ellen DeGeneres and send fan mail.
After getting the voicemail of every Detroit media personality on his T-Mobile Deluxe cellphone, it's time to head out for dinner. Yep. You guessed it. Back to Dimitri's, followed by another visit to GS Pizza and Burger King.
Day Two:
See Day One.
Bank records show that Marty ate at Dimitri's an average of 1 1/2 times a day and as many as FIVE TIMES A DAY!
The records we reviewed are nothing short of amazing. Just a quick overview:
84 visits to Dimitri's
27 visits to Burger King
17 visits to McDonalds
12 visits to GS Pizzaria
That's not all but I think you get the idea. The fact that Marty could spend this much time eating and still get his job done at the FBI, CIA, and the DOJ is truly an incredible feat.
We can only assume his evenings are equally disgusting in his mothers bathroom...
