Greetings and salutations to our thousands of loyal readers, including Marty and his crew of idiots - Racist Carla and Betty the Balloon Slut. Together, that trio corners the internet stupidity market.
I've been spending time trying to clean up CoM's former editor's office. I can now sympathize with the poor people that had to shovel out Marty's old rented room, although the smell of stale liquor and skunk beer can't be nearly as bad as the overwhelming urine stench and "masturbation by products" that likely haunts Marty's rented room to this day. Surely a code violation. You're welcome, Marty.
It seems Cookout saved every idiotic prediction Marty made, and there were hundreds, if not thousands. Bob planned on revisiting these predictions when the date they were supposed to happen arrived, but sold the company before he was able to get to it. I assume the endless flow of current Mongoose stupidity that needed to be reported just didn't leave time to cover the past lies.
After returning to my own office, I realized I might be falling into the same trap. I also have many records of bold predictions (lies) made by Marty. I then decided I needed to start reminding Marty of his past predictions and empty threats. "The time is now, Now is the time" these predictions should be happening. Today, I'll cover a particularly hilarious comment Marty made last June:
"Marty Prehn Marion Florence just thought I'd let you know that I'm going to be sending a birthday present to my brother Rick who has been converted so now his name is called dick and he's going to find out that if he thought he outsmarted me he's got another thing coming because the money is that were in the properties out in Colorado is not where the true inheritance was and I had a bet with my father that somebody in the family I thought it would be my sister Marlene but I was not totally right that he was just three of them marlane Shirley and Richard would challenge the my father's trust and I had a backup plan and they're going to find out on Richard's birthday what that was and I had to wait 5 years after the death of the surviving spouse in order to implement it so that will be on September 24th of my mother's passing which is going to be 5 years now and the other going to find out that they all forfeited their true inheritance and it was conveyed to me when the cottage got transferred and all of the contents I can't believe that they were stupid not never to question what that meant all of the contents but they will soon find out have a good day and I'm smiling from ear to ear. They sing in the Southern Baptist Church is on Sunday oh happy day do unto others as they have done unto you the money is that has been set aside will allow me to go after them and the legislation that I've had passed in Lansing allows me to go after them for three times the amount of money that was stolen from me in my inheritance and that it requires that they pay all of the attorney fees which would include the investigation by the FBI the Justice Department and the US Marshalls department it's going to be one hell of a story let me tell you."
Like most Mongoose droppings, this lie is both puzzling and very telling. Marty can't start any great future threat without first insulting the target. That's just standard for the immature idiot we all know so well. Then, Marty comments that his brother thinks he outsmarted the great secret agent Marty "Mongoose" Prehn. That in itself is so laughable. Nobody has to outsmart Marty, he dooms himself with his complete stupidity on a daily basis. Face it, Marty. A pile of sawdust can outsmart you.
Marty claims his siblings thought that the bulk of the Prehn estate was invested in properties in Colorado. Of course he doesn't mention the many properties that were located in Michigan because he had already sold them off while he was running and raiding the family trust. These were some of the funds that Marty refused to account for when the court demanded records of where the money went. Marty took a contempt charge instead of admitting what he'd done with that rather large sum of money.
Now, Marty appears to be claiming the bulk of the Prehn assets were hidden in some way at the lake cottage. The old "coffee can buried in the backyard" routine. Marty next references a "bet" he had with his father about what his siblings would try to do upon his father's death. I'm trying to imagine how that conversation must have gone. "Dad, I bet your other children will think they are entitled to some of the family estate when you die, but I'm going to make sure I get to keep it all. Don't bother to read this, just sign it!" Marty also says he had a "back up plan" just in case the siblings interfered with him stealing his parents entire estate. Is it just me or does this statement really point out Marty's greed? No wonder Marty was starving his mother. He was ready to hit the jackpot sooner than natural causes permit. He would have gotten away with it, had Marlene not become concerned with his treatment of their mother.
Marty next makes the same mistake he always does. He gives a date his lie is supposed to happen. This devil in the details gets Marty every time and proves just how stupid he is over and over. Never once has a single of Marty's threats, lies, fake events or other predictions come true. Never EVER! Marty gives the five year anniversary of his mother's death as the day his diabolical "backup plan" can be put into action and he can cash in on the hidden assets. Can't you just picture Marty mumbling to himself "How long has that woman been dead, anyway? I'm ready to get paid." Such a loving and caring person Marty is. If you don't believe me, just look at his recent Facebook posts.
As we all know, Marty also can't make a threat prediction without referencing his great importance and a few three letter agencies. Marty mentions he can go after his siblings because of "legislation I've had passed in Lansing". What a complete load of bullshit. Another claim by the Mongoose that he's somehow running things in the Michigan state government " behind the scenes". He also claims the siblings will be paying his legal fees and the cost for the - you guessed it - various three letter agency investigations. He further states that the mystery money he's claiming on the 24th will be used for this revenge. I know our government has been trying to cut spending but, when did the FBI, DOJ, and U.S. Marshals start charging up front for Marty's personal vendettas?
I'll close this "Marty threat reminder" by pointing out the great greed of the Mongoose and how it's the root of all of Marty's problems. He threatens that he's going after his siblings for three times the amount of money that was STOLEN from him. Marty feels that since he didn't get to keep all the money, and that some of that money was needed for top notch care of his elderly mother, it was stolen from him. Marty's greed was so great that he refused to let his mother's own money be used for her care. He was so greedy that he insisted on mounting a failed and baseless legal challenge to keep the money he wanted for himself, including her monthly social security check, away from his own mother. The remaining assets he hadn't already spent were further reduced by the legal bills incurred fighting him. Marty couldn't be happy with his fair share of the Prehn estate. His insistence on wanting it all to himself ended up costing him. The act of trying to accelerate his mother's death to collect is what ruined his plan. Rumor has it that just before Marlene rescued her, Marty entered her room and announced "Now is the time. The time is now!" Drats. Another Mongoose plan foiled.
The clock is now ticking on this threat, Marty. Sept 24th will be here soon and your siblings will likely visit their parent's final resting place. You, on the other hand, will be on Jr's living room floor, spewing your lies and hatred on Facebook.
I'll go ahead and make a Marty style prediction myself. Marty will be the same worthless, broke, bitter loser on Sept 25th as he has been his entire life and always will be.
